That depends.

- Will you do me a favor?
- That depends.
- On what?
- On what the favor is. I mean, by prefacing your request of a favor with the question of if I want to do you one gives me the option of saying no. If you’re going to ask me to pass you the bag of potato chips, well then, sure, I will do you a favor.  If you’re going to ask me to remind you when it’s 6 o’clock, then no problem, favor granted. If you’re going to ask me to smother myself in Vaseline, wrap myself in plastic wrap and then go door-to-door asking people to sign the Magna Carta, then fuck no, I won’t do you a fucking favor.
- Wow. Ok. Nevermind then.
- Good. I hate doing favors.

_____________________________________

- Are you being facetious?
- That depends.
- On what?
- On what facetious means.